Marriage

 

A partnership of the whole life.

The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament. CCC 1601

What is Marriage in the eyes of the Church?

Marriage is the intimate, exclusive, indissoluble communion of life and love entered by man and woman at the design of the Creator for the purpose of their own good and the procreation and education of children; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament. (1)

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Intimate communion of life and love.

Marriage is the closest and most intimate of human friendships. It involves the sharing of the whole of a person’s life with his/her spouse. Marriage calls for a mutual self-surrender so intimate and complete that the two become “one,” not only in body, but in soul. Far from clouding their uniqueness as persons, true marital love leads to each spouse’s deeper discovery of his/her personhood.
Build it.

Exclusive communion of life and love.

As a total gift of two persons to each other (physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually) this intimate union and the good of the children excludes such union with anyone else. It demands total fidelity.

Indissoluble communion of life and love.

Husband and wife are not joined by passing emotion or mere erotic inclination, which, selfishly pursued, fades quickly away. (2) They are called by God to a vocation of holiness, and joined by him in conjugal love by the firm and irrevocable act of their own consent. For the baptized, this bond is sealed by the Holy Spirit, is absolutely indissoluble. (3) Thus, the Church does not so much teach that divorce is wrong, but that divorce (in the sense of dissolving a valid marriage) is impossible, regardless of its civil implications.

 

Entered by man and woman

The complementarity of the sexes is essential to marriage. There is such widespread confusion today about the nature of marriage that some would wish to extend a legal “right” to marry to two persons of the same sex. The very nature of marriage makes such a proposition impossible.

At the design of the Creator

God is the author of marriage. He inscribed the call to marriage in our very being by creating us as male and female (Gen 1:27). Marriage is governed by His laws, faithfully transmitted by His Bride, the Church. For marriage to be what it is, it must conform to these laws. Man, therefore, is not free to change the meaning and purposes of marriage.

For the purpose of their own good

“It is not good for man to be alone” (Gen 2:18). Conversely, it is for their own good, for their benefit, enrichment, and ultimately, their salvation, that a man and woman join their lives in the Covenant of Marriage. Marriage is the most basic (but not the only) expression of the vocation to love that all men and women have as persons made in God’s image and likeness.

 

And the procreation and education of children

“By their very nature, the institution of marriage itself and conjugal love are ordained for the procreation and education of children and find in them their ultimate crown.” (4) Children are not added on to marriage and conjugal love, but naturally spring from the very heart of the spouses’ mutual self-giving as its fruit and fulfillment. Marriage retains its goodness even when couples are physically unable to have children. But intentional exclusion of children contradicts the very nature and purpose of marriage. (5)

Covenant

Marriage is a sacred covenant. God created marriage to mirror image and participate in his own covenant with His people. Thus, the marital covenant calls couples to share in the very love of God. Contrary to some trends in thought, the Church’s recent emphasis on marriage as a covenant does not exclude the idea that marriage is also a contract. It is true that a covenant provides a more sacred framework for marriage, but canon law still purposely uses both terms to describe marriage.(5)

The dignity of a sacrament

Marriage between baptized persons is an efficacious sign of the union between Christ and the Church, and, as such, is a means of grace (see below for a more thorough discussion). The marriage of two non-baptized persons, or of one baptized person and one non-baptized person, while not a sacrament, is considered by the Church a “good and natural” marriage.


(1) Cf. GS, n. 48 and CIC, Canon 1055
(2) Cf. GS, n.49
(3) Even if a marriage is not consummated, no human power can claim to dissolve it. However, the Church, in very rare cases, does have the more than human power, given by God, to dissolve non-consummated marriages.
(4) Cf. Ibid, n.48
(5) Cf. Canon 1055
Archdiocese of Denver website (
archden.org)

Wedding Guidelines

(Revised 1/3/2024)

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Saint Francis of Assisi (SFA) is a beautiful Catholic Church in Longmont, Colorado. Because of the overwhelming popularity of our church, we have created Wedding guidelines and policies to allow the Catholic faithful to use our church for their weddings.

If you are a member of Saint Francis of Assisi and wish to have your wedding ceremony in your parish, please contact, our Pastor through the parish office at least Nine Months in advance of the planned wedding date.

The Church celebrates each of the seven sacramental gifts by which we are strengthened and enriched by the Lord’s graces. The sacrament of Marriage is one gift that brings great blessings to the couple who is wed, to their family and friends, and to the Church as a whole.

As such, Saint Francis of Assisi strives to help couples prepare for not only a wedding day, but for a lifetime of grace-filled blessings in the relationship that will help lead them into eternal salvation. The following guidelines have been developed to best serve the sacrament, the couple, and the community at large. Saint Francis of Assisi is a Catholic Church within the Archdiocese of Denver. Weddings can be celebrated at SFA for all Catholics in the Archdiocese or other diocese based upon availability.

Basic requirements 

(Anyone considering a second marriage should be aware that time must be allocated for a possible annulment procedure.  Archdiocesan law prohibits the scheduling of a wedding until the annulment process is complete and an affirmative decision has been given. If you are interested in getting an annulment, please contact Michael Incorvia at 720-771-5849.)

The Denver Archdiocese requires a minimum eight to nine-month preparation period, and it is recommended that the engaged couple begin their preparation in their own diocese and their own parish and request their wedding date reservation up to a year in advance due to the number of requests that we receive.

A scheduling fee is required to reserve a wedding date at SFA.  This fee includes the use of Saint Francis of Assisi’s church for the rehearsal and wedding, as well as for the services of the organist, a cantor and our wedding coordinator.  The scheduling fee does not include any voluntary offering (donation) to the priest or deacon who witnesses the marriage or the cost of Marriage Preparation Programs through the Archdiocese.  Parishioners who wish to be married at SFA should call the office to discuss parishioner rates. The wedding scheduling fee is $1800.00 for non-parishioners.

Preliminary preparation

The engaged couple should schedule an appointment with our Pastor, who after an initial interview will introduce to you the marriage preparation guide to help you through the process. After that interview, the couple may schedule their wedding date through the office, and that date and time will be confirmed.

Necessary documents

For Catholic(s), a current copy of each individual’s baptismal certificate (issued within 6 months of the wedding date) from the parish of baptism.  The baptismal certificates must be given to the priest or deacon who is completing the wedding paperwork.   Non-Catholics are asked to obtain a copy of their baptismal certificate.

Marriage license

The State of Colorado requires a Marriage License for a wedding to take place, State licenses are valid only for thirty days. The wedding cannot be performed without a license. The license must be given to the wedding coordinator at the rehearsal.

Marriage ceremony

  • Most weddings will take place @ 1:00 PM on Saturdays, with Rehearsals taking place on Friday evening @ 5:00 PM. If there are conflicts with other liturgical services the SFA Office will advise at the time the wedding is booked.  If another day is desired, this is doable based upon availability of the church, musicians and coordinators, please discuss with the SFA Office.

    • A Nuptial Mass is the usual form for the celebration of the Sacrament of Matrimony between two Catholics.

    • A marriage between a Catholic and a baptized Christian is usually celebrated outside of Mass.

    • A marriage between a Catholic and an unbaptized person is always celebrated outside of Mass.

  • Planning the liturgy: You are asked to purchase a book: “ Together for Life, Revised” (published by Ave Maria Press, Joseph Champlin author – available on Amazon for under $10) which contains the scripture readings that may be used in the ceremony and the texts for the Marriage Rite.  When meeting with the priest or deacon who will be witnessing your marriage, you should discuss the readings and any other questions regarding your ceremony.   You should provide the celebrant and the SFA wedding coordinator with the selection form (from Together for Life) at least 4 weeks prior to the wedding.

Some helpful topics

  • According to the Archdiocesan guidelines, only Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion already mandated to SFA may help distribute Holy Communion.  Friends or family members mandated to their own parishes may not distribute Holy Communion at SFA.

  • An aisle runner is not necessary and is not allowed at SFA for safety reasons.

  • The tossing of flower petals is not allowed.

  • Liturgy/song books cannot be removed from the pews.

  • Wedding programs are acceptable but are not published by SFA, these are done by the couple at their expense and with their own publisher.

  • All flowers brought in for the wedding must be removed at the conclusion of the ceremony.

  • Bride and Groom rooms must be left clean.

  • You are allowed to use the facilities 1 hour before, and 45 minutes after the service.

  • A “Unity Candle” is not permissible.

  • Pew candles are not permitted; no tape or thumb tacks are to be used on aisle ribbons or bows.

  • The wedding coordinator will answer all questions you may have around the ceremony and what is proper and what will not be allowed.

Rehearsal

  • The rehearsal is usually the day prior to the wedding and is usually booked at the time the wedding is booked. Please arrive on time for the rehearsal.

  • The Wedding coordinator of SFA will handle the rehearsal.  Outside wedding coordinators are not allowed to run the rehearsal at SFA.

Music 

All parts of the liturgy are expected to conform to the Church’s standards for noble, sacred, and appropriate expressions of prayer and celebration.  As such, although many tastes in music are expressed by those approaching the sacrament of Marriage, the decisions on what is appropriate and fitting for the liturgical celebration, and the sacred setting must be approved. Please provide all music for approval to the Wedding coordinator.

The wedding scheduling fee for SFA does include the services of a musician and the cantor. 

Facilities

  • Bridal Room – The bridal room is for the convenience of the bride and her attendants.   The bridesmaids should come fully dressed, but there is room for the bridal party to dress here at SFA, as well as mirrors for touching up hair and makeup.   These rooms must be left cleaned and picked up after the ceremony.

  • Groom’s Room – The groom’s room is located in the library upstairs.  The groomsmen can use this room to change, however the door must be kept closed once men enter the room as it is also viewable from the Narthex.

SFA is not liable for lost or stolen items in the Saint Francis of Assisi church proper or any other church area.

Prohibitions

  • ALCOHOL, DRUGS OR ANY WEAPONS ARE NOT ALLOWED IN SFA OR ON SFA GROUNDS. Bridal party must be sober on the day of rehearsal, and day of wedding.

  • Rice, confetti, birdseed, silly string etc. may not be thrown inside or outside SFA due to the wildlife in the area. Bubbles are allowed well outside and toward the parking lot – please prevent any soap on the church floors and doors.

  • The sound system is not available for cassette playing or any other electronic device.

Photography & Videography Guidelines

  • The photographer, whether a professional or a family friend, must consult with the church Wedding coordinator to discuss the pictures taken during the ceremony.  Posed group pictures may be taken after the wedding ceremony. You will have 30 minutes after the ceremony for posed group pictures.  This must be done quickly, quietly, and respectfully, because you are in Church, and other services may be in progress.  Make a list of the pictures you want and inform those you want in the pictures not to leave SFA until their pictures are taken.

  •  After the ceremony, please go down the main aisle and proceed to the vestry, west side back of the church, so that the signing of documents after the docs are signed pictures may begin.  

  • Because of the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, all photographs must be taken in front of the main altar.  The photographer may not walk in the sanctuary, and may not move any furniture, candleholders, or chairs.  All off-camera lights, strobe lights, and umbrella lights are not allowed until after the liturgy is complete. No Flash photography is allowed during the ceremony, Thank you.

  • Spontaneous photography during the ceremony is permitted only at designated locations by the photographer.  Spontaneous photography by the guests is strictly prohibited.   “Roving” photographers/videographers must meet with the Wedding coordinator on the day of the wedding for instructions".

  • The photographer may take pictures of the wedding party coming down the aisle from one of the open pews of the church, not from the front.  Once the Bride is at the steps of the Sanctuary, the photographer may move around very discretely during the ceremony.

  • The videographer and/or photographer must remain inconspicuous.  The video camera must be placed on a tripod and remain stationary. 

Flowers & Decorations

  • SFA does not provide any special decorations.  We do not provide storage for any items; deliveries must be made on the day of the wedding.  Florists must check with the wedding coordinator regarding a suitable time for delivery.  The staff of SFA will not sign for any deliveries and are not liable for any items.

  • Christian liturgy is marked by elegance and simplicity.  In 90% of the weddings at SFA, the only flowers used are the Bride’s bouquet, and flowers carried by the bridesmaids.

  • If you desire pew bows or other decorations on the pews, no tape or tacks are permitted.  Bows may be tied with ribbon or hung with rubber bands

  • All decorations must be prepared before bringing them into SFA.

  • After the wedding, special decorations must be removed.  Please assign this duty to someone in your wedding party.  We do not have storage space to hold these items for you, and we are not responsible for any of these items left behind at SFA. 

  • If items have been forgotten in SFA, please have a family member or friend give the parish office (wedding coordinator) a call ASAP after the wedding to arrange for pickup of any items left behind. Those items left behind and unclaimed will be donated or disposed of.

Wedding Attire

Please keep in mind the solemnity and dignity of your wedding ceremony.  Even though current fashions can be very revealing, there are many choices that can be made for the bridal gown and bridesmaids’ dresses.  If anyone’s attire is revealing, you should consider wearing a small jacket or a shawl (quite often an option for the bridesmaids’ dresses). If anyone’s attire is deemed inappropriate by the wedding coordinator a shawl will be provided for them. We recommend mentioning this attire requirement to your Wedding guests as well.

Marriage preparation for out-of-town Catholics who wish to use SFA for their weddings

Follow your diocesan guidelines for marriage preparation.  This is done by first meeting with your own pastor and determining the best action plan for meeting the timing required.

Once all marriage prep is completed at your home parish your marriage prep mentor will provide all permissions and paperwork to your own diocesan chancery.  They will review and send the paperwork to our chancery, who will in turn send it to us.  Please note this process takes a few weeks to complete – please be cognizant of this when doing your marriage prep. If we at SFA have not received the documents through our chancery we cannot proceed with the wedding.

Scheduling Fee & Acceptance of Terms

Please note the scheduling fee is refundable up until the day of the wedding.


If the engaged couple comes to the wedding ceremony under the influence of drugs or alcohol the wedding will be called off with the full forfeiture of the scheduling fee.

Any donations (to priests or deacons) are the responsibility of the couple getting married, the scheduling fee does not cover anything other than the use of the facility, and the fees of the cantor, and the pianist. 

To reserve a wedding date the scheduling fee and acceptance of these terms and conditions is to be sent to the SFA Office – all scheduling fee checks must be made out to “Saint Francis of Assisi Catholic Church.”

Father Jim Crisman has final say on all things allowed for your ceremony. Please make sure everything is discussed beforehand. Discussing unknowns or changes on the wedding day will not suffice and most everything last minute will not be used.  Thanks for your help with this requirement.

We are not responsible for weather, traffic, train crossings or other events which present issues for the wedding parties to reach the church on time. Please leave yourself plenty of time to travel allowing for all conditions.

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Wedding Terms and Conditions

Acceptance Form

Please print, fill out, and sign the following form, and mail it to us (or bring it over), along with the scheduling fee:


St Francis of Assisi Catholic Church
3791 Pike Road
Longmont, Co. 80503
Attn.: Wedding Administration